Do Better

Before you try to dog out the man or woman you were with before #DoBetter! It makes no sense to not have forward movement in our lives. Not only do you need to find someone who is better, but YOU also need to be doing better! Doing better is an entirely different mindset. With all the things that broke me from my marriage, if I even smell something that seems similar, I'm cancelling that "nicca" like Neno! If I'm not going to #DoBetter then I should've stayed with the fool I was with. At least there are years built around that, or kids, or money, anything. Anything is better than dating someone new, and just like your ex they have no job, no ambition, no money, no car, and more kids than the last one! This is a rant. How can you call yourself growing or better than before if you keep putting yourself into the same dumb situation? You've learned nothing, and therefore deserve whatever treatment is sent your way.

You put your foot down, walked away, dogged out the individual you left. You went through heartache, reflection, talks with the girls or guys. You changed your look and create a façade that says, "I'm happier without you." Then you get pregnant or end up paying bills for someone who is equivalent or less than? You have not dealt with yourself and this is a problem. No one said it wasn't ok to be "single." Society made that up. Single = One. One whole complete person. Enjoy that fact. Work on yourself; pray more and try to establish a solid relationship with yourself. Go back to school, dream again, take care of your kids, write, reflect, and become more. Then maybe you'll find someone who is more. Because there's something to be said about someone who keeps attracting no nothing people. You are giving off a persona that says, "I'm afraid to be alone; I'm weak; use me at your will." Get it together! When you better yourself, you will attract someone who is better because you will love yourself enough to know that you clearly deserve more than you continue to settle for, and unfortunately that doesn't make you better than your ex…you two are still on the same playing field.

And definitely don't worry about them finding someone else to be with "so soon." There's always another weak man/woman out there waiting to fill your shoes. No lie. It's true, and unfortunately it happens more so for the ladies, where the man finds another dumb dumb to manipulate, than for the men. I guess it's because it's a 4:1 Ratio. The same thing happened to me. I left my husband, and immediately there was someone in my old townhouse, sitting on my couch, eating my food, watching my tv, hangin out with my daughter! Oh yes…this is true! But remember what my last post said… I couldn't allow him or her to think I would be angry over him because I wasn't, though she was using my toilet paper, I kept my cool. I took my child, walked out of that townhouse a lady because they needed to know, he didn't matter to me. I wanted to do better; I needed more for me. I could dog him, but it's not necessary…he's a great father and has a good heart. But my purpose in saying that I can dog him, is that you best believe I'm damn sure doin better! I'm living my life; sacrificing still from burdens laid on me from my marriage, but God. But God, is allowing me to dream again, live again, love again and it's because I never looked back. I loved myself and my child enough to not make the same mistake twice. So you've heard it from me; no excuses. Stop complaining and #DoBetter.

Love,

~Esynaj~