Love YOURSELF Unconditionally. If you don't then who will? Why does it seem we are never satisfied with the beauty God creates? The flaws we, as individuals, notice are usually the best features. Before when I put my daughter to sleep at night, I would tell her to bless those she loves (family and friends/strangers and lost ones), but I never had her focus on herself. And when I asked her does she love herself...she replied, "No Mommy, I love everyone else." This sent up a red flag. I don't want her to look down on anyone, but I definitely needed her to learn her self worth. From that point on she began to pray for/over herself. She's five, and it took me until after my marriage to love myself. I didn't even realize I wasn't loving myself...decided to let NO man define me. Women have been created by God to be loved by a man. Read the good book, but how can that man love you as he should, if you do not love yourself? What does it mean to love yourself? Loving yourself means that you always do what's best for you. You stand up for what you believe in. And if that man is a good man, he will love that about you. To love yourself means that you will not chase desperately after a man! The bible says, "He who finds a wife finds a treasure, and receives favor from the Lord" (Proverbs 18:22). Not the other way around.
Love yourself enough to say no. Satisfy yourself before you satisfy that man, and that does not mean...be selfish. If you are satisfied with you, then you will be able to give him the love he deserves, and he will be able to give that love back to you. Do not allow any premature sexual relations you have with a man to be demoralized with disrespectful words. "F'ing," "Banging," "Boning," etc. are not acceptable word choices. When the time comes, you should be making love, and hopefully with your best friend. Decipher a man who is a mess. If he knows you're worth it, and please believe me you are, he will wait. If he doesn't, then he doesn't deserve you. Loving yourself is not always easy, and it hurts. Constant decisions all the time may leave you alone...but be obedient, and be strong because when the time comes God will bless you with what your heart desires, as long as it's accordance with His will!
As a young woman, I love to be loved. I tried to define by value based upon how much a man loved me or how I was able to get him to love me. I allowed men to fill voids of my insecurities instead of allowing God to fill my voids. Allowing a man to define your self-worth is a set-up for major disaster! Why? If you depend on someone you do not stand on your own; as a complete being, which means as he literally walks out of your life you will fall...you will fall susceptible to mess because you cannot define yourself. I learned that if I love myself, and depend only on myself then love from a man will come naturally. He will know that I love myself and he will love that about me...Trust.
Take the time to get to know yourself. reflect on what you want, on who you are. Trust me you can have what you deserve if you love yourself to know that YOU DESERVE THE BEST!!